Flashback

When I was nine months old, I found out things die. I was in Portland, and my mother had got me a bird, it was alive for two days and died in the morning of the third. Then I always fantasied about dying. I would do it for hours a day. It made me sad and I cried sometimes when I made it bad enough, but it felt good. I spent my entire day over at my grandmother's house playing by myself from the moment my dad dropped me off at 6:45AM so he could go to work, to when my mother picked me up at 6 or 7 in the evening. The days were repetitive and it never bothered me because even though it was repetitive, it was different every time. My dad would drop me off (sometimes I pretend to be asleep so I don't have to get up and he would pick me up from my bed, put me in his car, pick me up again and put me on the couch in the living room of my grandmother's house), and I would spend the morning watching Mr. Rogers and Barney. When that was over (I didn't like the other shows that came after that) I went to go play with my toys for a couple hours. After I'm done with that I go outside and bother the gophers, swing on the swings, observe plants and animals, run around by myself, swing on the swings again daydreaming (I would do this for hours, sometimes the whole day). My grandma would tell me when Bobby's World was on and after that would be Power Rangers at one in the afternoon. My grandmother taught me nifty stuff. Like making shapes and other weird designs with a rubber band, she would teach me the time and numbers, but I never fully understood, I had just recognized the shapes. 1 and 2 were easy to remember. I had always imagined 1 to be new at things, adventurous and always willing and wanting to learn and explore. 2 would be friendly and is a teacher. 3 is a little mean, like my uncle bill, he's nice half the time and the other half of the time he's mean. 5 would be really mean to the lesser numbers. 6 would be even meaner but usually never bother 3, 2 and 1, but 6 would yell a lot at 4. 7 is even meaner than six but 6 is after is 7 and 5 would try to defend 6. 8 reminded me of my cousin, he's round, spoiled, his parents buy him a lot of stuff and he's a cry baby. 9 reminded me of my cousin's mother, she didn't like me because I was better than her son. Also these numbers would have a scent, color and taste to them... It's just not that apparent now.