The Detachment of Parasitic Entities Experiment -Entry #1 & #2

Wednesday, March 16, 2011 Entry #1

Day of Mercury

Day one of the The Detachment of Parasitic Entities Experiment. I barely remember anything from this day. My mother's boyfriend interrupted the experiment by asking me to bring one of those packaged lemonade medicine upstairs for my mother. I did. I went upstairs, knocked and opened the door into the room. I tapped on my mother's bed and showed her the drink. She turned, took note that it was me and turned back, ignoring me. Leaving me to stand there holding the cup. I will not put up with this bullshit. I put the cup down on the table-stand and quickly left the room in utter frustration. The door slammed slightly from my rush to get out before I screamed. I stormed downstairs and grabbed my things to bring upstairs. I am out of here.

I'm moving in with Tommy for a couple months in return for cleaning, cooking and being assistant photographer.

I don't know how to explain to other people my decision. It sounds impulsive, maybe it was, but I needed to get out and I needed a job.

The official job I'm looking to get is down the street, a fifteen minute drive. I'm really looking forward to working at this place. No, it's not a strip club. But I am also not going say what it is until I get the job, for fear that saying it will jinx me out of this dream job.

I cried in the car. I felt like I was going away forever. I felt like forgetting this plan and continue my mindless lap-toping and let myself rot away inside each passing hour. I stopped crying when I got to his place. I cried some more when I laid down at night to go to sleep. I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

Thursday, March 17, 2011 Entry #2

Day of Jupiter

I woke up early. 7AM. Usually I am not awake until 10AM or later. I had a weird dream. It was quiet. No one was here. I felt lost and alone. It was so cold that I desperately searched the house for a heater for what seemed like days. It was hidden near the door behind some large heavy wooden planks.

I sat staring into the nothingness. I am finally off the laptop from going at it for over a month.Wake, laptop, a meal, sleep, repeat. These soulless, unemotional tasks are killing me. Memory is rotting, emotionless, hostility, short temper, back pain and a ruin posture.

The emptiness I had used to fill with studying the occult history, meditations, studying of mathematics full time is gone. I spend my time thinking about people and how much I've taken them for granted.

I meditated on cleansing my chakras, body, and aura.

I had work with a photographer today at 11AM to 3PM. He was using one of the first cameras made, the film was tintypes and daguerreotypes. Every picture took five to twenty-eight seconds depending on the lighting and the film used. He let me watch him process the film plates. It started out with something that looks like a mirror, he would then put a red-coppery powder on it and polish it with a machine, then he would move it over to another station where he would polish it with something else. Then he would go over into the dark room and set the iodine into the plate, this took several minutes. After he got the color he wanted he placed it a case and went out to take a photo. After, he would come back and put it in a machine he has made. Then he would set the plate into a dish and pour a yellow chemical onto it, let it sit for a minute or two, then take it out and put it on a stand where he would pour another chemical of some sort onto the plate and he would light the bottom of the plate so the silver metal would dig into the plate. He would then pour water on it when he was done and quickly blow dry it. I spent three hours observing him.

Eric was in his early twenties, with short raven black hair, scruffy facial hair, uneven set eyes a little too close together and clothes with holes, chemical and paint marks on them, they must be at least a decade old. He also has one silver loop earring in each ear. His zodiac is an Aries but he looks more like a Scorpio.

I've been contemplating on whether or not to type this down, I guess I will since it's really off of what I usually think. I must be getting some side effects from the meditations.

I found myself staring intently at Eric from the side in the darkness of the room. I had the sudden urge to put my face in his hair and breathe in his muskiness. I wanted to kiss him hard and messy and I wanted him to push his groin into me.

I blinked and focused on work.