Sitting Around With A Blanket And The Windows Open For Hours

I am currently over at Steve's. It's four in the morning and I am awake by myself.

I drank A LOT... I couldn't even walk straight (and I am one of those weirdos who has perfect posture when drunk), but having an addictive personality, I hate and am really uncomfortable with lowering down (even just a little) to the normal state of mind. I remember stopping somewhere in the middle of Steve's house, telling him, "I think I'm depressed", he asked me why, but I don't remember what I said.

I made Steve these cinnamon-nutmeg-cookie-stick-monsters that came out of the toaster oven yesterday, I forgot to take a picture, I'll ask Steve to take one later, he only had one because he wanted to show his roommates.

Steve's refrigerator is growling along to Gehenna.

I did inventory work to loud pounding metal. That is one of the greatest moments of work in my life.

A couple days ago, I was raging with pure determination to get rid of a piece of skin that clung to my back. Skin and blood clung deep under my fingernails and made my hands slippery and sticky. That piece of my flesh was something that held me back and kept me down, so I got rid of it. I left it bleeding all over my back. The part of my body that vibrated failure is gone and the pain is a reminder.

The blockage is gone and everything that has been holding me back is quickly falling out of my way.